Wearing Armor is Highly Overrated

 

“What’s the meaning of this? No one bests an orc fighting naked!” The old bandit orc roared hoarsely.

“Lookie here…we got ourselves a naked one!” One bandit chief drooled out.

“Mercy!” The young female bandit recruit added. “Does that armor come in red?”

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Vilja seriously, stop getting naked while we fight!” Agent Lurren was at her wits end with the exhibitionist.

“Obviously you don’t know Inigo.” Vilja crossed her arms over her chest.

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“If I wanted to hear about some tall tale, I would read a children’s storybook. This is about you and fighting naked. Not Inigo! Even though Indigoblade has been known to do some things naked.  I’m sure this is not whom you refer to.”

“Agent Lurren if you aren’t proud with your own body that is your problem. Me, I have a great body and I’m proud to show it off…completely.” Vilja jutted out her chin to show she meant business. “Besides this is armor by Vergil. Sexy, isn’t it? I chose black but he offers many colors. Anyway it’s not the armor that counts but a good strong weapon.”

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“Have your brains been dripping out from the end of your pigtails? Are you nuts?! That’s not armor and no armor means quick death. I’ve just about had enough of you!”

“Bah, armor is for milk drinkers. Looking sexy in armor is key to distracting the enemies.” Vilja smiled brightly. “Hard for them to hit a pretty face!”

“Not me! So…” Agent Lurren narrowed her eyes, “tell you what.” She growled while lunging for Vilja.

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“You start running so I can see how well that armor holds up!”  Vilja screamed then took off running for the nearest town or guard or anyone at all to save her.